I just want to thank everyone for giving me some of the best advice I will ever receive, you guys are quite possibly what is getting me through all of this. I am excited to go to Saskatoon next August and until than I am going to focus on me and me alone. Morgan is going to be a part of my life but I am and have been completely honest with him and we are at an understanding.
Since I posted my last post which wasn't to long ago I have been doing well, this gluten-free and dairy-free thing has been kind of a breeze so far and I am liking it. I wake up in the morning with no joint pain, and I am no longer feeling chronically phlegmy so I am happy with it so far! I have been feeling alot less fragile since I told you all what is going on in my mind and life. I have downloaded some good sad songs on my ipod as well as some empowering ones. I keep telling myself that I am allowed to feel sad and afraid and if I need to be pathetic and cry like baby for an hour I can. I also can invoke my Sookie Stackhouse or Nancy Botwin and get tough.
You want to know some things I rely on in times of need, other than you guys?
My strong women role models(even if they are only tv characters) I find Sookie Stackhouse from True Blood and Nancy Botwin from weeds are my two that make me feel strong and like I can do anything.
Also is what I call the country gods. I know it sounds crazy but whenever I have needed advice or guidance through my life I haven't had anyone to turn to so when I was little and still to this day I find a country radio station, turn it on and listen. Whatever is playing I take like a musically fortune cookie and it always solves my problems. For instance after I wrote my post I turned on a country station and the song "a little bit stronger" by Sara Evans was on, I cried even harder and thought to myself that I deserve to be happy and I deserve to be in dependant. Crazy but it always helps.
So I am still here on this weight loss journey and I am also on track to become who I am meant to be. Thank you all you have no idea how much I needed you.
PS fatgirlinaskinnyworld I adore you for texting me, I defiantly needed a friend. I lost my phone since I texted you back so if you texted me back I am not ignoring you I just can't find my phone!! :(
My most recent picture.\