Im tired!

So I woke up this morning, and had a healthy philly cheese steak for breakfast( I feel like I should eat heavy stuff early in the day), than I went to the ggyymm. I was there for an hour and burned 660 calories according to the machine, I know its not accurate but I still feel accomplished. Than I had ridiculous amounts of energy so I drove to Kimberly and got that new protein shake, came home tried it, was grossed out. Like 15 minutes later I had an energy burst, I dont know what was in that vega shake but here is my theory.

Vegans are known to be like the healthiest people. Has anyone seen Scott Pilgram VS. the World? well I think they have it right. VEGAN POWERS-- I think after drinking that gross shake my VEGAN POWER kicked in and I was bouncing off the walls, I danced to achey breaky heart on repeat and cleaned for like half hour... it was weird.

So thannn My boy came got here and we went to the gym together and I burned another 400 calories. Than I ate 6 mini cookies and a salad, and 6 pieces of bacon.

I think I came in around 1500 calories for the day so I am right on target, yo. :)

HEY do you like my new look for the blog? Its springy/summery eh? yeah I needed a change.
What do you guys think of vlogs? are they better than just words? or are the words more powerful?

Have I told you all lately how much I love you? nahh I haven't, but I do, yall are great :)

I will be weighing in a couple days after my period is gone so that I get a good acurate reading, I can't take the disappointment right now.

wtf.

Why can't I just stick with it. I feel afraid to eat, and now when I do eat I go crazy. Back in the day I stuggled with anorexia and over exercise, I think i am afraid I will get it again and I am always struggling with food. I feel obsessed. I am thinking about it all the time, it is healthy? is it fattening? how much will I gain if I eat this? I really want a fucking cheeseburger.. i had lasagna today at east side mario and it was so good, I allowed myself to have it because if I don't indulge in the things I love than one of these days I am going to snap and eat everything including the pedestrians on the way to the grocery store. So I am going to concentrate on drinking more water and taking my fibre and see if that helps at all which it should. I have let go of my strictness with myself that I had for the first week and I have got to get my mojo back, bitches.